Learning to be happy

I am actually already a happy little soul. In fact sometimes I am so happy that I think I am a bit odd but I am happy being odd, so that's fine too. Today I read a about a new book which acts as a happiness manual. Check it out.
ACCEPT WHAT YOU HAVE Research shows that happy people have modest levels of expectation and aspirations while unhappy people never seem to get what they want. Happy people know how to avoid disappointments and how to generate pleasant surprises. This is because they strive for realistic goals and are happy with their lot. ENJOY WHAT YOU DO Happy people do what they enjoy and enjoy what they do — and don’t do it for the money or glory. There’s no point being stuck in a job you hate, surrounded by unfriendly colleagues just because the money is good — people forget that they are allowed to be happy at work, too. LIVE FOR TODAY Don’t dwell on the past, on things that went wrong or previous failures. Similarly, don’t dream about an idealised future that doesn’t exist or worry about what hasn’t happened yet. Happy people live for the now; they have positive mind sets. If you can’t be happy today, what makes you think tomorrow will be different? CHOOSE HAPPINESS Don’t be afraid to step back and re-evaluate your goals. Imagine your life as a story that you can edit and revise as you go along. This kind of flexible approach requires positive thinking and an open mind — you need to actively choose to be happy. RELATIONSHIPS We get our happiness from other people, and from supporting other people. Remember that just as other people can make us happy, we are all ‘other people’ to someone else. And cherish people who are important to you. Research also shows that married people are happier than single people. STAY BUSY If you want to be happier, develop an outgoing, social personality — accept that invitation, join that club, group or choir. Active, busy, social people are the healthiest and happiest, in society. Get involved. BE YOURSELF & DON'T COMPARE Ambition is healthy and makes people happy but envy makes them unhappy. Focus on your goals and dreams so that you can enjoy your ambition and achievements. Don’t compare your self with others. Don’t worry about what others think about you — truly be yourself. Happy people are spontaneous, natural and real. Being oneself makes one feel free and authentic. STOP WORRYING Don’t take yourself too seriously. Happy people don’t worry and they recognise that 90 per cent of worries never come true. GET ORGANISED We might envy those chilled bohemian types who just do things on the spur of the moment, but happy people plan and organise. They have goals and a purpose. You can only get what you want or desire if you know what it is you want or desire in the first place. So while those chilled-out friends might seem happy, they’re actually just drifting along. THINK POSITIVE Bottling up emotions and bad feelings creates psychological distress and even physical discomfort. Happy people get things off their chest. Similarly, work at developing optimistic thinking; happy people look on the bright side. Optimism is the mind’s natural self-defence mechanism against depression. VALUE HAPPINESS Happiness can be learned, but finding meaning and a purpose in life is what leads to it, not the other way around. The happiest people appreciate and realise that being happy adds years to their life, and life to their years.

Comments

  1. That 'stop worrying' one is hard. I have to come up with a plan B, C, and D just so I am not so worried if plan A doesn't work. Plus, I find that other people try to make me worried. It is really strange. But I am finally able to ignore those people and not let them get to me. It only took me almost 40 years to get there!

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  2. I sometimes think that if you have a good worry about something then it avoids that actual thing happening. But putting that away would be pretty good.

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